Finding that balance

Simple ways for WAHM's to balance work and relationships

No one has ever said that marriage is easy. Balancing your business, kids and marriage can be even more difficult. When you are feeling stressed, it is easy to put your relationship on the back burner. Which in turn causes more undue stress on you and your family.

Here are some ways to keep it front and center.

Just as you schedule time for your children and time to work, schedule time for your spouse. Set aside a weekly “date night”. Your dates don’t have to be expensive – it can simply be going out to lunch at the local diner, going for a stroll together around the neighborhood or playing cards after the kids go to bed. The point is just to set aside some distraction-free time for you and your spouse to talk and connect.

If you think you are too busy for a date night, ask your spouse to help you with some of the household chores. Just because you work from home, doesn’t mean you should be responsible for all the cooking, cleaning and laundry. You are working, and it doesn’t matter if you work across town or in a make-shift office in the corner of the dining room.

By sharing the chores, you are freeing up time to spend together. You can make it a family affair by getting the kids involved. For instance, designate every Saturday from 10 am till noon as “cleaning time”. Divide the chores among the family, turn on the stereo and have a “cleaning party”. You’ll be having fun together and getting the chores done.

It may not sound fun initially, but why not run your weekly errands together? You have to go to the grocery store anyway, so why not go as a couple? Having someone to talk to while you wait in line at the check-out stand could be a nice change!

You can also find time to spend together by asking your spouse to help you with your business. Your spouse will learn more about what you do and see you in a different light. Who knows? Your spouse may enjoy helping you and with their help, you will be able to achieve your goals twice as fast.

Stressed or Balanced

When your life seems out of control and you've got endless demands tugging at you from all directions, it's easy to feel overwhelmed, fatigued - and just plain stressed! Well doesn't everyone feel this way. Is that what life is these days? Okay maybe it's not suppose to be this way. But what can I do about it, I have taken on the job of parenting (you can't send them back) and wife, and to live in this current world and economy you gotta find ways to make money.

Believe it or not, balancing your life does not require massive changes. You don't have to quit your job, abandon your family and escape to a remote retreat in order to feel peaceful and happy. In fact, true balance is something that starts WITHIN YOU first and foremost - no matter what else is happening in your outer life circumstances.

Below you'll find three simple ways to begin building a greater sense of inner peace and harmony: I know we may have heard these before, but sometimes it's good to get reminded of how to cope once in awhile. Atleast take the time to site back relax and read the suggestions (there's 2 minutes of peace right there).

1) Quiet time.

One of the first things we tend to sacrifice when we're busy is our personal time. Instead we devote all of our energy and attention to caring for others, multi-tasking, meeting responsibilities and "being productive." Over time this depletes our energy and we begin to feel more and more burdened by our responsibilities. I would have to agree, I have been run down lately.

To live a more balanced life, quiet time to yourself is CRUCIAL. You may believe that you don't have any time available for yourself, but something amazing happens when you consistently MAKE time; you find yourself feeling happier and more energetic, your focus improves - and you still get plenty done! Just a few minutes spent sitting quietly in meditation or reading a book can do wonders in transforming stress into peace and happiness.

2) Self-care.

Beyond making time for things you enjoy, there are other ways to nurture and love yourself on a daily basis. Getting a full 8 hours of sleep (or as much as you personally need) is a great start, as well as eating nutritious food, exercising daily and speaking kindly to yourself.

Have you ever noticed that when you're really tired or stressed, even the smallest problem can seem like a nightmare? On the other hand, when you're feeling well-rested and centered, you're much better able to handle upsets. Caring for yourself is one sure way to consistently replenish your energy, inner peace and joy - which means you'll have the strength to handle whatever comes your way. This one is a big one for me, I always feel better after a nice shower and I get time to do my hair and makeup, a shave once and awhile is the ultimate.

3) Flexibility.

Did you know that one of the biggest causes of stress is rigid expectations? We all do it from time to time; get a mental picture of how our lives "should be" - and get really annoyed when our outer circumstances don't cooperate! One of the biggest gifts you can give yourself is a flexible state of mind. In other words, learn how to detach from unrealistic expectations and go with the flow.

When you have a flexible mind-set, you're able to deal with crises and problems much more easily because you're not working against a preconceived notion of how things "should be". You're able to tap into your creative problem-solving skills and move through challenges without all the drama and frustration. Be like the tree that bends with the breeze - and you're much less likely to break!

These inner changes can make a dramatic difference in your state of well-being, but you may also want to examine your outer life circumstances and see if there are other small changes you can make to help support your inner work.

For example, you might choose to let go of certain obligations that are no longer meaningful or enjoyable to you. Just because you agreed to host weekly meetings for a support group three years ago doesn't mean you have to keep doing it forever - especially if it's become a drain on your time and energy!

Be willing to let go of activities that no longer complement the lifestyle you desire, and you'll create a space for greater fulfillment, joy and peace.

Lets work on this for a month, cause it takes a month to make a habit and I'll update you all on how more balanced I feel.